Chapter 19
Lucas hesitated but it seemed Sarah hadn’t noticed as she escorted the excited little girl to the admission
gate. Paying they went on their way and Lucas trailed them tossing money at the clerk without counting or
waiting for his change. Sarah and the girl paused at the sea lions with the girl clapping excitedly at the
animals’ antics.
From there the pair seemed to wander at random using conveniently placed signs to direct them to particular
animals. No matter what exhibit the girl took equal delight in the animals present. She even seemed fascinated by frogs and bugs which Lucas thought all girls thought creepy and gross. The only animals she
didn’t seem all that interested in were apes. She liked the monkeys just fine but their tailless cousins didn’t
elicit the same excited giggles. Lucas wondered why.
Nearing lunch time they paused at a food stand for hotdogs and Icees which seemed a big hit with the girl
who proudly showed off her blue tongue. Lucas’s lips twitched with a smile at her adorable antics. And
Sarah’s laughter rang in his mind like chiming bells. How did he live so many years without either?
His phone buzzed alerting him Alan was on site. He had sent the other a text from the cab when Sarah’s
destination was eminent and apparently Alan finally managed to catch up. Tearing his eyes away from the
scene in front of him Lucas gave directions based on the nearby animal exhibits and waited as Sarah and the
girl leisurely finished their lunch. Alan managed to reach him as they were leaving and continued their
exploration.
“Damn, you are hard to find,” Alan sighed while they trailed the pair.
“What took you so long?” Lucas asked.
“I was getting information for you. Thomas.”
“What?”
“Her last name,” Alan said. “I found her vehicle in the parking lot and had a friend run her license plates.
Vermont plates, by the way.”
“Vermont?” Lucas couldn’t believe it. He spent four years looking for her and she was less than a five-hour drive away? How was that possible? “Thomas?”
“Yeah. Sarah Thomas. She must have changed it legally.”
Why Thomas? He supposed it was close to her maiden name but most people were attached to their given names as it connected them to their family. Lucas’s brow furrowed.
Could it be she was not on good terms with her brother? But Lucas thought they were twins. Weren’t twins close? Julius’s twins were so in tune with one another they seemed capable of communicating without speech. Silas’s triplets could carry on whole conversations with only a glance or two. Was that not true of all multiples?
Once again Lucas was reminded of how little he actually knew about his wife. He saw her now so full of life and energy. With such an active daughter Sarah needed every bit of it. Lucas felt his own stamina flagging
when they made it to the camel rides. Gratefully he sighed when it became clear they were going to wait their
turn for a ride.
“What’s her name?” the girl asked when their turn came,
“This is Ruby,” the keeper informed.
“Hi Ruby!” she giggled. “You’re very pretty.”
Incredibly the camel responded by swinging its head around for her to pet. Even the keeper seemed surprised
by the animal’s receptiveness but happily conveyed all sorts of camel facts as Sarah and the girl climbed aboard and sat quietly while the keeper led the camel along the walking track.
The girl was enraptured with the animal leaning forward to stroke its coarse fur. Lucas couldn’t help himself
snapping pictures of them as they passed his location: When they reached the platform again the keeper
took Sarah’s phone and snapped pictures as well before they dismounted and departed.
Eventually they made it to the children’s petting zoo. They paused briefly at the bug carousel and the girl rode
it long enough for a picture but it didn’t seem to have the same effect on her as the camel ride. However her face lit up again in the Butterfly Garden and of course the petting zoo where she immediately bonded with
the goats. An alpaca seemed to take particular interest in Sarah who laughed as she petted the friendly
creature.
“Excuse me, mister.”
Lucas suddenly stiffened and slowly turned to see the girl was standing beside him. How did she move so
fast?
“Mister, why are you following us?”
S**t.
Lucas’s mind raced. How did she notice him? When? Why confront him now? What was he supposed to
say?
“Do you want to talk to my mommy?”
“I… Yes. I do.” Lucas crouched down to her level for the first time able to study her closely. She looked so much
like Sarah. But there were slight differences and a few characteristics he recognized every time he looked into a mirror. It was strange to see his features on such a feminine, round face but also fascinating. There was no longer any doubt in his mind. She had to be his daughter.
“Do you know my mommy?” she looked at him her hazel eyes shining with mirth waiting for an answer he didn’t know how to give. “Should I yell for her?”
“No!” Lucas panicked.
She giggled.
God, did she have to be so cute?
“If you don’t answer I’m going to scream.”
Cute but vicious.
“Y-yes. I know your mommy,” Lucas finally said twisting his wedding band. “I…used to be married to her.”
She tilted her head suddenly serious as she studied him for a long moment before asking, “Are you my daddy?”
Lucas sucked in a breath. How was he supposed to answer that when he still didn’t know what Sarah had told her about him? But there was no doubt in his mind.
“I…I think so. Has-has she talked about me?”
“No.”
His heart sank and Lucas bowed his head fighting his disappointment. But what else did he expect? Maybe she never thought about him at all.
“My name is Zoe. What’s yours?”
Zoe. It was the perfect name for her. He hesitated before answering, “Luke.”
“Are you going to hurt my mommy?”
He winced at the seriousness of her question. Lucas looked at his daughter. Her eyes seemed a little browner
as if reflecting her determined attitude. Gone was her childish mirth. She was very serious.
“No. No, of course not. I…” Lucas looked down at his wedding ring. “I hurt her before and I want to apologize. I
want…I want a chance to be with her again.”
Zoe pressed her lips together deep in thought. He hesitated to guess what was going on in her mind. After another long moment she said, “Okay. But you have to promise not to hurt my mommy or make her cry.”
“Right.”
“Pinky promise,” Zoe help up her hand extending the pinky.
He hesitated before wrapping his much large digit around hers.
“This is serious, daddy. You never break a pinky promise.
Lucas blinked his heart practically jumping out of his chest when she called him daddy but it was tempered
by the seriousness of her expression. This was no laughing matter. Lucas nodded showing he
understood.
“I promise. I won’t hurt her and I won’t make her cry.”
Zoe narrowed her gaze as if scrutinizing his sincerity before nodding in satisfaction. Suddenly she raised her
hands. He hesitated before embracing her for the first time. He was actually hugging his little girl.
“Zoe? Zoe, where did you go?”
“Over here mommy!” Zoe answered and Lucas almost dropped her as he straightened to face a panicked
Sarah.
For the first time in four years he faced his wife with no clue what he should say. Her expression was not difficult to read: surprise, fear, uncertainty, panic. It was her fear that cut him deepest. He didn’t expect their first meeting to be smooth but he didn’t want her to be afraid. Anger would be easier to withstand.
“…Sarah.”
Her gaze flickered from him to Zoe who was calm in his arms despite the situation she caused. Zoe just smiled and declared, “Mommy, I found Edward.”
Sarah suddenly blushed but Lucas was confused. Edward? She already knew his name so why get it wrong on purpose and who was Edward? And why did Sarah react like that? Lucas glanced at Alan but he was equally confused.
“Sarah…I think we need to talk,” Lucas said watching her reaction carefully as her gaze wavered between fear and anger.
She kept looking at Zoe as if her daughter had all the answers. Finally she nodded. Lucas allowed himself a brief moment of relief. At least she didn’t deny him outright.
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